Armand:
Al, you old son of a b*tch! How ya doin'? How do you feel about that call today? I mean the Dolphins! Fourth-and-three play on their 30 yard line with only 34 seconds to go!
Armand:
You do an eclectic celebration of the dance! You do Fosse, Fosse, Fosse! You do Martha Graham, Martha Graham, Martha Graham! Or Twyla, Twyla, Twyla! Or Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd! Or Madonna, Madonna, Madonna!... but you keep it all inside.
Albert:
You know, I used to feel that way too until I found out that Alexander the Great was a fag. Talk about gays in the military!
Armand:
I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. I mean, I walk in the door and there's a woman in my bed!
Armand:
Oh, God. And I thought, "what the hell, let's try it once with a woman and see what those straight guys are raving about."
Albert:
That sarcastic contemptuous tone that means you know everything because you're a man, and I know nothing because I'm a woman.
Senator Kevin Keeley:
Louise, people in this country aren't interested in details. They don't even trust details. The only thing they trust is headlines.
Albert Goldman:
Whatever I am, he made me! I was adorable once, young and full of hope. And now look at me! I'm this short, fat, insecure, middle-aged THING!
Albert Goldman:
"You look tired" means "you look old." And "you look rested" means "you've had collagen."